Victor Mentality vs Victim Mentality: Are You A Proactive Warrior or A Reactive Worrier?
Updated: Jun 16
So What is the Difference Between Victor Mentality & Victim Mentality:
1, Victim Mentality: A person with victim mentality will always blame other people or outside circumstances for their problems.
They always make excuses for their problems.
They believe bad things will always happen to them.
They wallow in their misery and tend to quickly slip down the slippery slope of excessive self pity, negativity and depression.
2, Victor Mentality: A person with victor mentality won't waste too much energy blaming others or making excuses for their problems.
They have a more positive outlook on life. They will do their best to heal their feelings of sadness and negativity by engaging in activities to stay centered.
They try their best to focus all their energies on finding solutions for their problems.
Advice: Life will always be like a roller coaster ride - Exciting yet Scary at the same time. We will never know what can happen to us each day - That is why we need to adopt a healthier mindset that knows how to celebrate the good and the bad in life.
How Does One Celebrate Bad Situations?
By learning how to extract the positive lessons that the bad situations have taught us.
But that’s easier said than done - As humans we often overthink, hesitate, vacillate ....going back and forth between feeling confident and self assured to feeling doubtful, scared and lost. This back and forth between two extreme ways of thinking, basically means that we have a tendency towards over analysis, low self esteem and lack of faith.
There are some people who tend to be more negative and reactive towards everything that happens to them - While some others tend to be more proactive and positive.
So which one are you?
1. When faced with life problems do you feel powerless?
A, VICTIM MENTALITY: Do you mostly feel powerless, frightened and incapable of solving life problems?
B, VICTOR MENTALITY: Even if you are faced with a difficult life problems - Do you tend to engage in life enhancing activities to calm yourself - And when you feel calmer do you try to think about the different resources available to help you cope with your problem more effectively?
2. Do you blame others for your problems?
A, VICTIM MENTALITY: You tend to immediately start doubting other people’s intentions. Without taking time to understand their true intent - You tend to start blaming them for purposefully trying to hurt you. It is very difficult for you to see the good in other people
B, VICTOR MENTALITY: You consider the perspectives of everyone involved and try to truly understand if someone actually wants to hurt you or whether it’s just your imagination. You can appreciate the good and bad in people.
3. Do you have a tendency to exaggerate your problem?
A, VICTIM MENTALITY: The smallest issues make you feel like your life has been turned upside down. You immediately start complaining about your problems to close friends & family. You hate that life always treats you so unfairly
B, VICTOR MENTALITY: You don’t let the smallest problems affect your mental state. You know how to calm yourself by learning different centering practices like meditation & Ascension Healing.
You don't like complaining about each and every problem to those around you.
4. Do you let the problem completely take over your life and peace of mind?
A,VICTIM MENTALITY: You feel compelled to keep painful memories alive. You tend to be unforgiving and spend a lot of time thinking of ways to take revenge.
B, VICTOR MENTALITY: You spend a healthy amount of time introspecting whether you’re stuck in a downward spiral of negativity. And then you try your best to process and heal any negative memories & feelings.
1, Congratulations! Recognizing whether you lean towards victim mentality is the first step towards change.
Now that you have put in the effort to to recognize whether you lean towards victim mentality or not...
2,The second step is to take your power back into your own hands. Instead of blaming outside forces for your misery - It’s important to take the initiative to change your mindset by learning how to adopt a proactive mindset.
Remember, whichever mindset you choose each day will eventually add up to your whole life - So choose wisely! But in order to understand how to choose the right mindset - We need to first understand how emotions influence our minds.
Emotion = Energy in Motion.
It's important to understand how emotions flow through us.
Why do feelings of hatred, sadness, fear & anger make us feel low..... And why do feelings of love, happiness, hope & peace make us feel like we are in a higher state of being?
You see, emotions are our inner compass - They act like messengers, by telling us what feels good and what feels bad.
It's through our emotions that we can make sense of the outside world and know whether we feel good about a situation or not. But there is a catch - we must not hold on to the messenger and obsess about the message OR MISINTERPRET THE MESSAGE.
There is no point holding on to the message of sadness and obsessing over it - Because then it turns into depression. A healthier approach is to process the message with the help of introspection. Introspection helps us understand why something is making us feel sad and it will also help us understand the lessons we are meant to learn to stop the sadness AND TURN IT INTO A BLESSING.
Remember: Every situation whether good or bad is showing us:
1, If we are on the right path.
2, And if we are not on the right path - It shows us which steps are required to get back on to the right path. If we all processed our emotions this way - we would regain our balance and equilibrium more easily.
Have you always wondered how certain people seem calm and centered, even during the most difficult situations?
Have you ever wondered how these people cope with daily life problems without losing their temper? Well the truth is that these calmer and more centered people view life differently - For them each day brings in new opportunities to practice being their higher self.
When you feel Sad, Lost, Unworthy, Irritated , Angry - It’s important to adopt a daily practice that integrates you with your HIGHER SELF, so that you know the difference between healthy introspection and over analysis. There is no visible proof of this Higher Self but then again we can't see the two most powerful energies that help us survive: Gravity and Air - We can only feel it. Similarly, your Higher Self may not be seen - but it's reassuring love, support and guidance can definitely be felt. 1, Your “Higher Self” is that all knowing, unlimited and eternal part of you that guides you with intuition and teaches you through insight. 2, Your “Higher Self” is very calm, reassuring and helps you recognise the difference between low self esteem and your true potential. 3, Your “Higher Self will show you how to you heal yourself and will nudge you in the right direction - so that you make appropriate choices that are important for your success and growth.
With the help of techniques like Meditation & Ascension Healing we can learn how to process our doubts, judgements & sadness from the past and also learn how not to stress about the future.
The present is a blessing, a gift to truly step up and make positive changes in this NOW moment. Each decision, each step adds up, leading us towards our unique stairway to heaven, right here on Earth! Every time you are faced with a problem - You have the power to decide whether you want to take the escalator down towards negativity or up towards positivity - You can either choose to keep thinking negative thoughts and spiral downwards helplessly towards negativity or slam the brakes and change direction by simply engaging in activities to elevate your mood.
Are You Being A Proactive Warrior or A Reactive Worrier?
Go Through this list below to check which inner voice do you listen to more often?
Are you listening to your Higher Self? (PROACTIVE WARRIOR - Calm & reassuring inner voice) or Are you listening to your Lower Self? (REACTIVE WORRIER - Habitual fears & doubts)
1, Do You Give Into Procrastination?
Reactive Worrier: Do you tend to postpone your to do list and the activities in your daily routine for another day?
Do you keep making excuses for not being able to fulfil your daily goals - While you continue indulging in negative habits?
Do you keep complaining about why the universes isn’t giving you what you want - When actually you aren’t putting in the steps needed to achieve your goals?
Proactive Warrior: Are you mostly disciplined and focused on achieving all the activities on your daily to do list.
Do you eat healthy, avoid negative habits, workout, live a balanced life - By taking daily action towards your dreams and goals.
2, Are You Overly Self critical?
Reactive Worrier: Do you always strive for perfection? Do you always feel like you will never be good enough? If you receive 4 compliments and 1 insult - Do you ignore the 4 compliments you received and keep thinking about that 1 insult in your head?
Proactive Warrior: Do you know how to train your brain to override unproductive negative thoughts that make you feel low?
3, Is Your Glass Always Half Empty or Half Full?
Reactive Worrier: Your let your Lower Self make you think pessimistic thoughts - You tend to focus on the negative side of each situation.
Proactive Warrior: You are in alignment with your Higher Self. You tend to be grateful for the blessings & also the lessons learnt in every situation whether good or bad.
4, Do You Practice The Attitude Of Gratitude?
Reactive Worrier: Do you take all your blessings for granted. (Family/ Friends/ Your Talent / Your Health / Roof Over Your Head)
Proactive Warrior: Do you practice gratitude for on a daily basis for all your blessings.
5, Negative Over Analysis?
Reactive Worrier: Are you filled with fear and negativity about your present, past and future ? Do you focus more on what can go wrong in every situation.
Proactive Warrior: Do you try your best to focus on hope, faith and positivity on a daily basis. Do you tend to see the silver lining in every situation?
6, How Do You Process Negativity?
Reactive Worrier: Do you keep replaying negative situations in your head? Do you see yourself as a helpless victim every time you think about these negative situations?
Proactive Warrior: Are you able to process your anger and sadness to understand how to become calmer, more centered and wiser from your experiences.
Life Hacks to Overcome Victim Mentality & Worrier Mentality:
We aren’t puppets! So why do we let our problems push and pull our emotions, moods & thoughts?
Did you know that each time you think negative, fearful or angry thoughts - You awaken your “fight or flight survival response” within your body that releases hormones that harm your body over time.
When faced with life problems -The wisest thing you can do for yourself is to treasure hunt - Find the MESSAGE IN THE MESS: 1, When you feel sad/ lost/ irritated / unworthy / angry .... Understand that these emotions and feelings are trying to give you a message. 2, But you won’t be able to understand that message when you are still angry or sad. 3, You need to first neutralize your energy - So deep breathing / walking barefoot in nature / listening to music or watching something inspirational will help you feel calmer. 4, Then in that calm state - Try to focus away from negativity by Focusing on 3 Things you are Grateful for & 3 Things you Love about yourself. 5, These thoughts of gratitude & love will help you raise your frequency by instilling positive emotions within you. It is scientifically proven fact that our bodes can’t tell the difference between imagination and reality. (That is why we cry while watching a movie)
But why do we need to raise our frequency to solve problems?
"We cannot solve A problem from the same level that the problem was created in ...We have to first find ways to gain a higher perspective - So that we can find solutions to the overall problem." 6, After following the steps above you will begin to feel calmer and more centered - Which is then the best time to connect with your Higher Self to understand the MESSAGE that’s coming from the MESS! Eg: Anger is mostly showing you that a boundary has been crossed. Feeling Lost means that you are disconnected from your Higher Self & Unworthiness is showing you that you need to love and appreciate yourself. 7, Now that you are calm, you will be able to find solutions to your problems - Enjoy this process like you would enjoy a fun brainstorming game.
8, Write down all the solutions you come up with. Then choose the one that reassure you the most.
9, It’s important to act on the solutions you finalize - Don’t leave all those wonderful solutions to rot in your notebook.
10, If the solution is complex - Break it down into baby steps and don’t delay taking that first step towards solving the problem.
LIFE AFFIRMING HABITS/ ACTIVITIES THAT STRENGTHEN YOUR HIGHER SELF:
I hope you found this article helpful. Here is a list of life affirming habits to help you elevate your mood when you feel low:
1, WATCH / READ INSPIRING TED TALKS/ VIDEOS/BOOKS/ ARTICLES/ SCREENSHOTS /AFFIRMATIONS 2, WORKING OUT: YOGA / DANCE /RUN/ GYM 3, MEDITATION / CHAKRA HEALING / ASCENSION HEALING / DEEP BREATHING: REPLACE THOUGHTS OF WHAT COULD GO WRONG WITH THOUGHTS OF WHAT COULD GO RIGHT. 4, AFFIRMATIONS / MANTRAS 5, EATING HEALTHY: ORGANIC /FRUITS/ VEGGIES 6, AVOID CHEMICALS/ ALCOHOL/ FLUORIDE/ NEGATIVE MEDIA 7, SUNLIGHT / BEING IN NATURE (SWIMMING/WALKING BAREFOOT) 8, VISUALIZATIONS TO ACHIEVE GOALS. 9, LAUGH: WATCH/ READ SOMETHING FUNNY 10, FOLLOW YOUR HIGHEST EXCITEMENT IN THE NOW MOMENT 11, MAKE INSPIRATIONAL PLAYLISTS OF SONGS/ VIDEOS 12, SPREADING LOVE : VOLUNTEER/ HELP/ DONATE /GUIDE 13, JOURNAL YOUR THOUGHTS/ IDEAS/ SIGNS / SYNCHRONICITIES/ 14, GRATITUDE LIST: COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS 15, SPEND TIME WITH FAMILY: FRIENDS/ PETS / BUILD YOUR TRIBE 16, ENGAGE IN HOBBIES: JOIN A CLASS / CREATE SOMETHING
If you have anything to add, I would love to read your thoughts and stories in the comments section below.
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